Sharing Passwords
Kitty and I were having a heated discussion the other day about the sharing of passwords.
It all started when I mentioned something about a picture on Facebook and she wanted to see it. Since she didn't have an account she asked for my login. Now this is where it gets dicey - I refused. I don't give out my passwords to anyone. It's not even a matter of the information that I care about. I would be totally fine with me logging into whichever of my accounts and then she can look at anything she wants.
I just don't like other people messing with my stuff. For example, logging into gmail logs you into gtalk as well and if someone started a conversation, and she didn't respond, they might think I'm rude. Or any other program where logging in and doing something might inadvertently affect the state of the program without me knowing about it (for example marking unread emails as read). An analogy I thought of is that it's like having a workshop or garage that is basically off limits to her. Except, since I'm a geek, in my case instead of a workshop, it's my online accounts.
Her argument was that it was a matter of trust. I don't trust her enough to give her my passwords. I don't think that's the case, since I don't really mind her looking through any of my accounts. If trust is a matter of content, then there's no problem for me, but if it's a matter of meddling, then it matters to me. To make matters worse, she had told me one of her passwords in the past. Way back, I got her password to Xanga so that I could log in to post a comment. I have to admit, I hate Xanga (too restrictive), and I was not about to go get an account from them just to post comments. I don't understand why Xanga's so popular, it's almost as bad as myspace, but I digress.
Maybe I'm biased, because I had a bad experience with sharing passwords. I used to share a locker for working out and we happened to use my combination lock (that I had had for >10 years, since middle school). One day, I shared my locker combo with my workout partner. That very same day I lost my lock. Probably had something about not following a routine of unlocking the locker and snapping my lock onto my backpack right away. Anway, I had to get a new lock, and I'm still learning the combo to that one.
Maybe I'll change my mind 20 years from now, but for now that's my opinion. I finally convinced Kitty to get her own facebook account (yay! finally!), since it made the most sense in this situation.
Anyway, what do you think about this topic? For those couples out there, what do you do? And for you single people, what will you do when you meet someone? Does the length of time you're with someone matter? (Kitty and I have been together for 4.5 years and we don't share passwords, but my parents who've been together a much longer time share passwords) Eventually, you'll share things like bank account passwords when you're married, so does being married make a difference? Anyway, leave comments and let me know if I'm anal.
It all started when I mentioned something about a picture on Facebook and she wanted to see it. Since she didn't have an account she asked for my login. Now this is where it gets dicey - I refused. I don't give out my passwords to anyone. It's not even a matter of the information that I care about. I would be totally fine with me logging into whichever of my accounts and then she can look at anything she wants.
I just don't like other people messing with my stuff. For example, logging into gmail logs you into gtalk as well and if someone started a conversation, and she didn't respond, they might think I'm rude. Or any other program where logging in and doing something might inadvertently affect the state of the program without me knowing about it (for example marking unread emails as read). An analogy I thought of is that it's like having a workshop or garage that is basically off limits to her. Except, since I'm a geek, in my case instead of a workshop, it's my online accounts.
Her argument was that it was a matter of trust. I don't trust her enough to give her my passwords. I don't think that's the case, since I don't really mind her looking through any of my accounts. If trust is a matter of content, then there's no problem for me, but if it's a matter of meddling, then it matters to me. To make matters worse, she had told me one of her passwords in the past. Way back, I got her password to Xanga so that I could log in to post a comment. I have to admit, I hate Xanga (too restrictive), and I was not about to go get an account from them just to post comments. I don't understand why Xanga's so popular, it's almost as bad as myspace, but I digress.
Maybe I'm biased, because I had a bad experience with sharing passwords. I used to share a locker for working out and we happened to use my combination lock (that I had had for >10 years, since middle school). One day, I shared my locker combo with my workout partner. That very same day I lost my lock. Probably had something about not following a routine of unlocking the locker and snapping my lock onto my backpack right away. Anway, I had to get a new lock, and I'm still learning the combo to that one.
Maybe I'll change my mind 20 years from now, but for now that's my opinion. I finally convinced Kitty to get her own facebook account (yay! finally!), since it made the most sense in this situation.
Anyway, what do you think about this topic? For those couples out there, what do you do? And for you single people, what will you do when you meet someone? Does the length of time you're with someone matter? (Kitty and I have been together for 4.5 years and we don't share passwords, but my parents who've been together a much longer time share passwords) Eventually, you'll share things like bank account passwords when you're married, so does being married make a difference? Anyway, leave comments and let me know if I'm anal.
Labels: passwords, relationships, trust
posted by Nelson at 11:52 PM
16 comments
